Hi guys, this is Ola here.
If you haven't seen any of my previous videos,
check them out after watching this one,
I talk on this youtube channel about my life as an independent disabled person.
So last week I posted a video about things that I really like about being disabled.
So I'll link this video below and I'll also link it somewhere
up here.
But this week we are going to be complaining.
Ok? So the first point is people staring at me,
I hate people staring at me.
I really don't mind people coming up to me and asking about my disability.
I would rather have someone ask me than just stare at me and maybe I don't know,
assume what kinds of kind of disability I have.
I just don't like, you know,
when I'm walking down the street or when I'm standing somewhere in public space
and people are just looking and they're looking in this way that you know,
that they're staring
and they're looking at my hands.
So I just really, really, really don't like it.
So if you ever see me in public and you want to,
you know, talk to me or talk about my
ability, ask anything,
just come to me and ask me about it. I really don't mind it.
All of these
people don't like it, they don't like being asked.
So don't assume that everyone is like me.
But if you ever see me in public and just come up and don't just look at me because I,
the next point would be of the times when people were assuming that
I can't do something without even letting me try to do this thing.
It's just very annoying because I can do most things and people
just looking at my hands when they don't usually know me,
they just assume that I can do something and they're trying to help me,
which should be nice, but it's not nice.
I don't see it as a nice thing because
they're just assuming that
I'm not able to do something even though I am.
It happens most often when I'm, for example, in a shop and I'm packing all of my stuff,
uh, after paying for it and then
people who work there,
they're just coming up to me and saying, 00, come here, come here, I'll,
I'll help you, I'll pack it for you
or something like that. And I mean, it's very nice of them, but I can do it myself.
I know I probably take more time but,
you know, I just wanna do it myself.
The next point are all the people who don't
know me and when they try to characterize me to
my friends or family, they say things like, for example,
oh, ola, um, the one with four fingers
or,
oh, ola, the disabled one
that's just so annoying. You know,
I really don't like people who see all this disability in me. I understand.
It's probably the easiest way to kind of distinguish me from
other ola if there is any
but it's still just very, but it's just not nice. You know, you can, I don't know,
distinguish me from other people by saying that I have, I don't know, brown hair or
I don't know that I'm short or something like that.
You don't have to, you know, say that I'm disabled because even though I,
you know, don't mind people saying that I'm disabled because I am and that's normal,
I just don't like people seeing my disability as the only thing in me.
And by the way, I have all of my five fingers. I mean, even 10, this is the proof.
Look, there's one and there's four
is five and 10 on both hands.
And the next point which you've probably heard about before,
if you're watching any other disabled youtubers or bloggers
is that I'm an inspiration because of my disability.
And I'm not,
I can be an inspiration for you, you know,
doing other things.
I don't know what, to be honest, I can be an inspiration. Binging. Netflix shows.
I'm very good. At it. But I can't be an inspiration because I was born with something
I know that people usually mean that I inspire them because I had a lot of surgeries or
I had all of exercises and they probably think
I'm strong because of that or something like that.
But
it just,
I just don't really understand it because when I was younger I had a lot of exercises,
let's say
once a day or something like that, then other kids,
my age were doing dance classes every single day or, I don't know,
painting classes or piano classes.
So
each of them was doing something that could be very inspiring for other people.
But still people think that I am inspiring because I had surgeries,
which I just don't understand.
And I would really
rather have people telling me that I'm inspiring
because of some other reason than my disability.
So the fifth point is kind of similar because it's when
people tell me that I am smarter because I'm disabled,
which
ok, maybe I'm smart,
but I don't want people to think that I'm smart just because I'm disabled.
And I remember people telling me when I was younger
that just because
I am less able, physically, I am more able mentally and my brain works better.
I even remember my doctor telling me that which I don't think is true.
And even if it is true by any chance and if you have any, you know,
research that can confirm that I just don't like it because
I really just want people to think that I am smart
just because I'm smart and not just because I'm
disabled because that just first
brings a lot of pressure on me because I feel like I have to be very, very smart now and
I have to get good grades because I'm disabled.
And on the other side, it makes me think
like I'm smart just because I'm disabled and not because
I'm working hard on studying or something like that.
And the sixth point is the fact that I had kind of a busy childhood
because of all the exercises and the trips that I had to make
uh abroad for surgeries and for doctor's appointments,
I feel like maybe I've missed out a little
bit on some parts of childhood that other kids got
like, I don't know, some extracurricular classes or something like that.
I still had some, like I had piano, I had English and French classes.
But I feel like maybe if I didn't have to,
you know, do all the exercises and trips and surgeries,
maybe I would have more time for that.
Maybe I would have more time for my friends.
I also remember that I loved going to kindergarten,
but when I was younger I had exercises every single day.
So I had to leave kindergarten a bit earlier than other kids.
And the best days were when I didn't have my exercises sometimes
and I could stay longer and play with all of my friends.
So, you know, I had amazing childhood
but,
you know what I mean?
I just feel like maybe if I wasn't disabled then maybe I
would have more time for other things that I really liked.
And the next point is just not being able to do some things, like,
play some sports or going through some activities with my friends
or playing some instruments, which I think I would like to do if I was able to do them.
But the range of sports and instruments that I can play is very limited just because I
am not able to do some things.
And I would really love to go with my friends
to ice skating sometimes or for a bike trip.
I just can't, even though I can do other things,
I would still like to join them sometimes on this
other activity that I just can't do because of disability.
So the next thing which I found being kind of annoying quite recently
is the problem of transport and commuting because I can't ride a bike.
I have to walk everywhere here where I live
and I have driving license,
but it doesn't really make sense to have a car in the city where I live
because it's just a small city.
Some distances are still kind of long for walking,
but they're too short for driving.
If you know what I mean, so they're perfect for, for just cycling,
but I can't ride a bike.
So I kind of have to walk everywhere
and that's just tiring for me because my
feet get tired more easily than other people's.
And I just can't walk for a long time or stand
for a long time because it just hurts my feet later.
So it would be great if I could just cycle or ride a skateboard.
But I also can't ride a skateboard because my balance is not too great.
So the only way for me is having a car,
but it doesn't really make sense to have a car now.
And it's also very expensive.
The ninth point is the fact that I just can do
some of the jobs.
Like, even if my biggest dream was to become a doctor or a paramedic or a firefighter,
I just
couldn't do that because of my strength and because of my abilities.
And there is just a lot of different careers that I couldn't pursue
because of my disability.
So I kind of had to choose something that is more
based on your mental abilities than on your physical abilities.
Even though a few months ago,
I was still thinking that after I finished the course I'm doing now,
which is journalism, I would go to film school if I go in,
I kind of had to decide not to do it and to look for other
platform for myself because after having some
film classes at the university right now,
I've realized that I'm just not able enough
to work with cameras and heavy equipment.
But I still love filming and editing and working on videos.
So this youtube channel is kind of a way for me to do what I love.
And the 10th and the last point
are all of the years that I've lost on hating my body because it's true.
I've spent most of my life just hating my body trying to
hide it all the time hating the way my hands look like.
And I still feel insecure sometimes,
but I think I've just learned to love my body the way it is right now
and it really changed my life for much better. So I wish
I had done that much earlier
and I wish I just didn't waste so many years on just hating the way I look like.
Thank you all very much for watching.
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